Those that like to tell other people what to do, and those that want those people to shut the fuck up, leave them alone, and mind their own business.
Okay, maybe there's a 3rd type that likes to be told what to do. Inconceivable!
Monday, December 31, 2007
Now I've seen it all...
France & Germany ban smoking in bars & cafes.
I thought I'd never see the day where one couldn't smoke in a French cafe. Couldn't we just have smoking bars and non-smoking bars? Or cafes? Then, if our concern is for the workers in those establishments, they could choose to work in a smoking bar or not.
Why do we have to ban everything? I know cigarettes are bad and all, but not everyone gets cancer from them! It's just those goody-two-shoes types in everyone else's business again. For god's sake, find a new hobby that doesn't involve infringing on other's personal liberties!
Fascists!
I thought I'd never see the day where one couldn't smoke in a French cafe. Couldn't we just have smoking bars and non-smoking bars? Or cafes? Then, if our concern is for the workers in those establishments, they could choose to work in a smoking bar or not.
Why do we have to ban everything? I know cigarettes are bad and all, but not everyone gets cancer from them! It's just those goody-two-shoes types in everyone else's business again. For god's sake, find a new hobby that doesn't involve infringing on other's personal liberties!
Fascists!
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Monday, December 24, 2007
What D&D Character Am I?
I Am A: True Neutral Human Fighter/Ranger (2nd/2nd Level)
Ability Scores:
Strength-13
Dexterity-16
Constitution-13
Intelligence-15
Wisdom-16
Charisma-13
Alignment:
True Neutral A true neutral character does what seems to be a good idea. He doesn't feel strongly one way or the other when it comes to good vs. evil or law vs. chaos. Most true neutral characters exhibit a lack of conviction or bias rather than a commitment to neutrality. Such a character thinks of good as better than evil after all, he would rather have good neighbors and rulers than evil ones. Still, he's not personally committed to upholding good in any abstract or universal way. Some true neutral characters, on the other hand, commit themselves philosophically to neutrality. They see good, evil, law, and chaos as prejudices and dangerous extremes. They advocate the middle way of neutrality as the best, most balanced road in the long run. True neutral is the best alignment you can be because it means you act naturally, without prejudice or compulsion. However, true neutral can be a dangerous alignment because it represents apathy, indifference, and a lack of conviction.
Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.
Primary Class:
Fighters can be many things, from soldiers to criminal enforcers. Some see adventure as a way to get rich, while others use their skills to protect the innocent. Fighters have the best all-around fighting capabilities of the PC classes, and they are trained to use all standard weapons and armor. A fighter's rigorous martial training grants him many bonus feats as he progresses, and high-level fighters have access to special melee maneuvers and exotic weapons not available to any other character.
Secondary Class:
Rangers are skilled stalkers and hunters who make their home in the woods. Their martial skill is nearly the equal of the fighter, but they lack the latter's dedication to the craft of fighting. Instead, the ranger focuses his skills and training on a specific enemy a type of creature he bears a vengeful grudge against and hunts above all others. Rangers often accept the role of protector, aiding those who live in or travel through the woods. His skills allow him to move quietly and stick to the shadows, especially in natural settings, and he also has special knowledge of certain types of creatures. Finally, an experienced ranger has such a tie to nature that he can actually draw on natural power to cast divine spells, much as a druid does, and like a druid he is often accompanied by animal companions. A ranger's Wisdom score should be high, as this determines the maximum spell level that he can cast.
Find out What Kind of Dungeons and Dragons Character Would You Be?, courtesy of Easydamus (e-mail)
Ability Scores:
Strength-13
Dexterity-16
Constitution-13
Intelligence-15
Wisdom-16
Charisma-13
Alignment:
True Neutral A true neutral character does what seems to be a good idea. He doesn't feel strongly one way or the other when it comes to good vs. evil or law vs. chaos. Most true neutral characters exhibit a lack of conviction or bias rather than a commitment to neutrality. Such a character thinks of good as better than evil after all, he would rather have good neighbors and rulers than evil ones. Still, he's not personally committed to upholding good in any abstract or universal way. Some true neutral characters, on the other hand, commit themselves philosophically to neutrality. They see good, evil, law, and chaos as prejudices and dangerous extremes. They advocate the middle way of neutrality as the best, most balanced road in the long run. True neutral is the best alignment you can be because it means you act naturally, without prejudice or compulsion. However, true neutral can be a dangerous alignment because it represents apathy, indifference, and a lack of conviction.
Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.
Primary Class:
Fighters can be many things, from soldiers to criminal enforcers. Some see adventure as a way to get rich, while others use their skills to protect the innocent. Fighters have the best all-around fighting capabilities of the PC classes, and they are trained to use all standard weapons and armor. A fighter's rigorous martial training grants him many bonus feats as he progresses, and high-level fighters have access to special melee maneuvers and exotic weapons not available to any other character.
Secondary Class:
Rangers are skilled stalkers and hunters who make their home in the woods. Their martial skill is nearly the equal of the fighter, but they lack the latter's dedication to the craft of fighting. Instead, the ranger focuses his skills and training on a specific enemy a type of creature he bears a vengeful grudge against and hunts above all others. Rangers often accept the role of protector, aiding those who live in or travel through the woods. His skills allow him to move quietly and stick to the shadows, especially in natural settings, and he also has special knowledge of certain types of creatures. Finally, an experienced ranger has such a tie to nature that he can actually draw on natural power to cast divine spells, much as a druid does, and like a druid he is often accompanied by animal companions. A ranger's Wisdom score should be high, as this determines the maximum spell level that he can cast.
Find out What Kind of Dungeons and Dragons Character Would You Be?, courtesy of Easydamus (e-mail)
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Shaving Scenes
I cringe every time I watch a man on television or in movies start to shave. I'd guess about 95% of the time, they will cut themselves. I sit there and dread the moment when he will do so, wincing when he finally draws blood. You never know exactly where on the face he'll do it, or how long into the shave--or maybe, just maybe, this will be one of the times when he'll finish with a clean towel wipe. Or it will cut away suddenly, or--SSSSS (intake of air sound), there, he did it. Blood pours from his open wound and he struggles to contain it. I also can't help but be angry at the guy. I mean, how often does a man cut himself shaving? I can't even remember doing it in the last few years. Isn't that amateur stuff or am I just gifted with god-like surgical hands? The whole thing makes me feel like a kid with a Jack-In-The-Box--you knew it was coming, but you never knew when it was going to pop up and scare the shit out of you.
Anyway, I hate it, it sucks and I'm starting an organization to lobby congress and devoting my life to the cause. Join me at www.stopshowingmencuttingthemselvesshavinginmoviestvandingeneral.org.
Anyway, I hate it, it sucks and I'm starting an organization to lobby congress and devoting my life to the cause. Join me at www.stopshowingmencuttingthemselvesshavinginmoviestvandingeneral.org.
Friday, December 21, 2007
Man's Dominion Over The Earth
King James Bible
"And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth."
For years, I've heard Christians quote this passage as proof that we don't have to worry about global warming, extinct species, chemical-polluted rivers, etc. That God gave us the Earth to rule and to use as we see fit. And, when it's spent and unlivable, they think that that is the time when Jesus will come back and take them all to heaven. Even our "President" believes this.
My question is this: Did God intend for us to rape and pillage the earth, leaving it a smoking ruin--or did he intend for us to take care of it, to tend to it, and keep it in good condition, this his most perfect creation?
I'm sick and tired of people using this passage as an excuse for their own gluttonous behavior & lack of self-control. I mean, how much respect can you have for the most amazing creation in the universe if you just wantonly destroy it at every turn in order to satisfy every little selfish desire? Do you really think God approves? Or are you just using this "faith" you have to allow yourself to still feel good about yourself while you turn a blind eye to the inevitable destruction that we are all headed for? I have a secret for you: your god is not coming to rescue you or anyone else. It's up to us to keep his world in good working order for ourselves.
Oh yeah, and the rich people who tell you what to do (and warn you of the "tree-huggers") don't really believe your Jesus stuff--they just want to keep the profits flowing and damned be the consequences. They know that stopping the pollution will cut their profits down severely and they want their yachts and mansions and power over others. They don't care if we all die horribly or if civilization ceases to exist--they're going to ride it out like Slim Pickens' on that nuke from Dr. Strangelove.
So, if you truly believe in God, do us all a favor--wake up and realize that destroying the most precious thing in the universe, our home, is not the way you show God your love. It's by taking responsibility (like the rest of us, the "liberals," "intellectuals," "tree-huggers," "environmentalists," etc) for your share of the problem. You know what's right, it's time to quit hiding behind the scripture and start remembering what it is to truly love God.
"And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth."
For years, I've heard Christians quote this passage as proof that we don't have to worry about global warming, extinct species, chemical-polluted rivers, etc. That God gave us the Earth to rule and to use as we see fit. And, when it's spent and unlivable, they think that that is the time when Jesus will come back and take them all to heaven. Even our "President" believes this.
My question is this: Did God intend for us to rape and pillage the earth, leaving it a smoking ruin--or did he intend for us to take care of it, to tend to it, and keep it in good condition, this his most perfect creation?
I'm sick and tired of people using this passage as an excuse for their own gluttonous behavior & lack of self-control. I mean, how much respect can you have for the most amazing creation in the universe if you just wantonly destroy it at every turn in order to satisfy every little selfish desire? Do you really think God approves? Or are you just using this "faith" you have to allow yourself to still feel good about yourself while you turn a blind eye to the inevitable destruction that we are all headed for? I have a secret for you: your god is not coming to rescue you or anyone else. It's up to us to keep his world in good working order for ourselves.
Oh yeah, and the rich people who tell you what to do (and warn you of the "tree-huggers") don't really believe your Jesus stuff--they just want to keep the profits flowing and damned be the consequences. They know that stopping the pollution will cut their profits down severely and they want their yachts and mansions and power over others. They don't care if we all die horribly or if civilization ceases to exist--they're going to ride it out like Slim Pickens' on that nuke from Dr. Strangelove.
So, if you truly believe in God, do us all a favor--wake up and realize that destroying the most precious thing in the universe, our home, is not the way you show God your love. It's by taking responsibility (like the rest of us, the "liberals," "intellectuals," "tree-huggers," "environmentalists," etc) for your share of the problem. You know what's right, it's time to quit hiding behind the scripture and start remembering what it is to truly love God.
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Come on people, spell check these things!
This photo is of my TV yesterday. The ad was in heavy rotation. Things like this disturb me.
My Special Psychic Ability
I have a few, little known, psychic talents. One of which I demonstrated again today at lunch: I was going to the Kinko's to use their photo printing machine. I get an hour for lunch and I had to drive out of my way to get there. Therefore, I was feeling pressed for time and worried that there would be a long line, or worse, that the machine would be down. As I walked toward the Kinko's, I got the distinct impression that someone was heading towards my same destination. I looked around and everything sort of slowed down without actually slowing down (impossible to describe this feeling). I then immediately spotted a very tall blond woman moving quickly in the general direction of Kinko's. Now, she could have been headed to the 10 other stores that were in that direction, but I KNEW that she was headed into Kinko's to use the photo machine. I quickened my pace, but she was much too fast for me to catch without actually running (which I don't do anymore in these situations--I'll tell you why in a minute). So, as I made my way into the store and to the photo machine, I was not at all surprised to see the tall blond woman walk right up to the photo machine and get in line in front of me. She could have been going anywhere! There were people all over the mall (it's x-mas for god's sake); but, I sensed and then spotted my opponent without any effort at all and knew with certainty that she would be competition and obstruct my ultimate goal (which was to get in and out of that place ASAP). Turns out she was pretty cool and I helped her with her photo sizing and cropping (more so than the employee there, really--I'm an old hand at those things).
This is not an isolated incident. Many who know me have seen me do this on more than one occasion. I'll speed up walking suddenly and say, "we have to beat that guy, he's going where we are." Sometimes I beat them, sometimes not. I'd say my predictions come true about 80% of the time. I think that the 20% that I'm wrong is likely to be when I'm especially stressed about time and I get too paranoid.
Oh, and the reason that I don't just run ahead of my opponents when I sense their purpose is that several times I've done this and wind up in an embarrassing situation (like almost knocking some old lady over) or, I kid you not, my opponent speeds up as well, perhaps somehow sensing me as well?
In any case, the usefulness of this ability has yet to be fully determined. Several times it has served me well getting the last table in a restaurant, or getting that almost-sold-out product; but, I have yet to test it on anything more substantial. Perhaps it's a little-understood instinct left over from the caveman days? Perhaps I can read people's intentions by the pace of their walking or gate? Perhaps it's all a bunch of bullshit? I really don't know. All I do know, is that it's kind of spooky.
This is not an isolated incident. Many who know me have seen me do this on more than one occasion. I'll speed up walking suddenly and say, "we have to beat that guy, he's going where we are." Sometimes I beat them, sometimes not. I'd say my predictions come true about 80% of the time. I think that the 20% that I'm wrong is likely to be when I'm especially stressed about time and I get too paranoid.
Oh, and the reason that I don't just run ahead of my opponents when I sense their purpose is that several times I've done this and wind up in an embarrassing situation (like almost knocking some old lady over) or, I kid you not, my opponent speeds up as well, perhaps somehow sensing me as well?
In any case, the usefulness of this ability has yet to be fully determined. Several times it has served me well getting the last table in a restaurant, or getting that almost-sold-out product; but, I have yet to test it on anything more substantial. Perhaps it's a little-understood instinct left over from the caveman days? Perhaps I can read people's intentions by the pace of their walking or gate? Perhaps it's all a bunch of bullshit? I really don't know. All I do know, is that it's kind of spooky.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Windshield Wipers
I'm pretty decent at fixing a car. At least, let's say, in the old days, I could perform many complex repairs including replacement of various items (i.e. alternator, battery, starter, brakes, etc). I've replaced a clutch all buy myself once, pulling the transmission out onto my chest, rolling it off me, then (somehow) heaving it back onto the engine and managing to get all 10 bolts in place. I've even repaired the linkage between the clutch pedal and the transmission in the pouring rain, at night, in the middle of hwy 9 between Felton & Santa Cruz.
But the fucking windshield wipers get me every time. How could something so simple be so difficult to replace? I have wasted hours of my life trying to get the damn things to stay on the wiper arms, threading the rubber onto the frames, and cursing God and auto manufacturers for their cruelty.
Nowadays, I don't even bother. I pay someone to do it. Okay, I pay someone to do most of my car repairs now... Anyway, last night I drove my wife's car in the rain at night and I could barely see. Today, I took it in to the oil change place I go to in Novato (great place) and paid $20 to watch some kid fool with them for an hour in the driving rain. I sat there under my umbrella and my water-proof shoes and watched this poor guy struggle like I used to do. Finally, he managed to get them on (and was soaking wet to boot) and I thought to myself, "Self, this is one advantage of getting older (or at least having a little extra money)." Poor bastard will probably be sick tomorrow. Ah well, he's young!
Funny thing is, I was the one who was pissed because I had to use my whole lunch hour on this task. Isn't that ridiculous? I watched some guy get soaked in the rain for lousy minimum wage and all I could think about was how I was inconvenienced.
But the fucking windshield wipers get me every time. How could something so simple be so difficult to replace? I have wasted hours of my life trying to get the damn things to stay on the wiper arms, threading the rubber onto the frames, and cursing God and auto manufacturers for their cruelty.
Nowadays, I don't even bother. I pay someone to do it. Okay, I pay someone to do most of my car repairs now... Anyway, last night I drove my wife's car in the rain at night and I could barely see. Today, I took it in to the oil change place I go to in Novato (great place) and paid $20 to watch some kid fool with them for an hour in the driving rain. I sat there under my umbrella and my water-proof shoes and watched this poor guy struggle like I used to do. Finally, he managed to get them on (and was soaking wet to boot) and I thought to myself, "Self, this is one advantage of getting older (or at least having a little extra money)." Poor bastard will probably be sick tomorrow. Ah well, he's young!
Funny thing is, I was the one who was pissed because I had to use my whole lunch hour on this task. Isn't that ridiculous? I watched some guy get soaked in the rain for lousy minimum wage and all I could think about was how I was inconvenienced.
Phone Pics
Whenever I see one of my friends on the phone and I have my cell with me, I like to take a picture of them. I make that the picture that pops up on my phone when they call. It gives me the feeling of a split-screen movie shot telephone conversation. Often, these pictures are blurry, since I'm drunk.
Margot At The Wedding
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0757361/
Saw this last night, I really enjoyed it. Wonderful characters, great acting. If you liked The Squid & The Whale, you'll like this one. My kind of movie.
Saw this last night, I really enjoyed it. Wonderful characters, great acting. If you liked The Squid & The Whale, you'll like this one. My kind of movie.
Monday, December 17, 2007
Friday, December 14, 2007
The Anti-Pedophile Coloring Book is here!!!
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/g/a/2007/12/12/notes121207.DTL
I'm so excited now to raise my kids Catholic!!
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